With almost twenty years as a psychological counsellor I still yearn for listening stories of people, their relationships and helping them in therapy sessions, lectures and - in recent years - books. I really love my work as a psychotherapist – it is an extraordinary privilege to explore the depths of the inner gardens of another person. Sometimes the therapist is just somebody to talk yourself out to. At other times the therapist is an experienced guide who helps you to change your thinking, behaviour and relationship patterns, or get closer to understanding someone important in your life. And often yourself. Sometimes the role of the psychotherapist is to be a friendly translator between a couple who have forgotten their common language. Or just somebody to remind you about your own inner strengths.
Experience as a therapist:
• 1997 – … private psychological counselling, holistic therapy and family therapy practice
• 1998 – 1999 The Tallinn Psychiatric Hospital – Department of First Episode Psychosis, practice
• 1999 Psychosocial Rehabilitation Centre for People with Enduring Mental Health Problems, lecturer
• 2001 – 2003 Raasiku municipality family therapist
• 2008 – … Holistic Therapy Institute, lecturer for family therapy
• 2009 – … creator and lecturer for training series “The Art of Being a Woman. Discover Your Feminine Power Through the Magic of Archetypes”
I do not form my opinion of a person by reading a CV. It lists the schools and the years spent studying, but is quite muted about what real knowledge was captured during these years. It also does not give any idea of the person’s values, worldview, ethics, kindness, creativity, humour. But as it is customary and long-standing tradition to describe one’s biographical data, see mine below.
• 1977 – 1988 Tallinn 21. Secondary School
• 1988 – 1993 University of Tartu – Master of Humanities
• 1995 – 2000 Private School of Professional Psychology - Psychological counseling
• 1998 – 2001 Family psychotherapy training - Family therapist
Non-traditional / World View Altering Courses:
• 2003 - 2006 Holistic Therapy Institute – holistic regression therapy
• 2004 The Newton Institute for Life Between Lives – regression therapy
• 2009 - 2011 Larissa Renar Academy - master classes on femininity
The field of counselling enables but also requires lifelong learning. During the time of my work as a psychotherapist I have gone through some courses each year, listing them all here would not add much value. The most recent really good additions were a Dutch counseling program "No Kids in the Middle" training in 2015, which taught how to raise high-conflict parents' awareness of their quarrels' impact on children's psyche, Professor Maurizio Andolfi master class "Individual, couple and family therapy: how to choose the best" and Mindfulness course by Anni Kuusik in 2016.
Other Work Experience:
• 1991 – 1996 Estonian Business School, lecturer (English)
• 1997 – 1998 Tallinn Song Festival Grounds, Project Manager
Main Volunteering Activities:
2006 – ... The Good Deed Foundation, Partner
2007 - 2011 Rocca al Mare School, Member of the Parents' Committee
Recently I have started to write on the problems I often encounter in my therapist role. It is also said that one explores mostly the areas where she has the biggest room for improvement. Go figure. "The Art of Being a Woman. Discover Your Feminine Power through the Magic of Archetypes" was first published in Estonian in 2015. It became bestseller in Estonia, so it is now translated also to English. The book explores healthy inner world of women through the lenses of archetypes. Powerful woman is the most beautiful divine creation. How can you live your life so that the divine source in you wouldn’t dry up? So that the spark wouldn’t dim and you would grow your power with age? So that this power would feed your self-esteem and relations? How can you live your life to masterpiece? It is a real art for me and evergreen theme also after completion of the book.
“Healthy Stepfamily Handbook” was completed in 2016. In today's world, individual search of happiness often leads to “second round” relationships – nearly half of all marriages break up. This is just a fact of life and as such neither good nor bad (although many of those relationships could have been saved with the right relationship hygiene). What is bad – utterly bad – is the situation I see too often as a family therapist where one of the parents is pushed out of child’s life on the request of the other or where one parent chooses to marginalize oneself in the child’s life. Or when children find themselves in the middle of the battleground of their parents' war. As the result child’s self-image and self-esteem will get damaged – as well as secure childhood all children deserve. Thankfully things do not get that bad in most situations and there are ways to smoothen effects of parents’ relationship break-up to children. And to the related adults. The handbook consists of recommendations for civilized break-up and forming a healthy stepfamily with stories inspired by real life cases - viewed from the angles of the main participants in this complicated and delicate period of life.